


does a bear shit in the woods? do i love you with the intensity of 100,000 suns? (alt. title YOU CARE ABSOLUT ME)

by voidtierbec



Category: Suicide Squad (2016)
Genre: F/M, First Dates, Fluff, Threats of Violence, alcohol mention, fluff with threats of violence... yeah thats digger and tatsu ok, i wrote digger like a damn puppy i just realized..., idk how to tag this my dudes, text dialog only (mostly), this would be considered... fluff?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-27 14:55:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8406046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/voidtierbec/pseuds/voidtierbec
Summary: this is... so self indulgent my dudes, I just wanted terrible digger/tatsu.. and i really liked that college au so i added to it...its just... digger being himself and tatsu giving him a chance despite.. what he does and says..maybe next time i won't write as terriblereal talk i wanna write more of thisbut honestly this is to terrible, just take itYOU GOTTA READ THE INSPIRED FIC FROM SASSYKARMA FIRST THO, ITS SO GOOD ; w ; and like the basis of this fic tbh





	

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [SQUAD (yes we are a squad fight me)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7953535) by [sassykarma](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sassykarma/pseuds/sassykarma). 



\----Monday 12:04am -----

saucyaussie: tatttssssu  
saucyaussie: hpney,.  
saucyaussie: *honey/  
saucyaussie: ...  
saucyaussie: p lease andwer ilveoyousomuch!!@  
saucyaussie: ijkow youre up!!  
t.yamashiro: You have 1 minute to apologize and explain yourself. Its midnight.

\- 3 minutes later -

saucyaussie: SHIT,.  
saucyaussie: OK IM SORRY DARL  
saucyaussie: DIDN'T TYHINK YOUD BE UP  
t.yamashiro: You also didn't think I'd get these messages.. at all?  
saucyaussie: NO  
saucyaussie: YES  
t.yamashiro: Turn your capslock off.  
saucyaussie: yes s madamn  
saucyaussie: MADAM  
saucyaussie: SOEERY  
t.yamashiro: Stop it. You've clearly been drinking. Take some advil, drink more than 8 oz of water and please sleep.  
saucyaussie: .........  
t.yamashiro: What  
saucyaussie: YOU CARE ABSOLUT ME  
t.yamashiro: Others wouldn't want you to be groaning with another hangover headache in class tomorrow. Including me.  
t.yamashiro: I don't care. Don't think I do.  
saucyaussie: okjh but darll ya care abotu me so much youre; TRYING!!  
t.yamashiro: Listen I'll fucking block you again if you say that to me or anyone else we know  
saucyaussie: hto!!@!  
t.yamashiro: George. Go to bed please.  
saucyaussie: sure htignk darll  
saucyaussie: i loveu!!!! goodnfight  
t.yamashiro: I feel indifferent to you too. Good night Harkness.

\------------Tuesday 11am-------------------

saucyaussie: shit... i'm sorry 'bout all this  
saucyaussie: but don't act like i didn't see that "too" last night  
t.yamashiro: Don't take that as an act of adoration or attraction, I was trying to make a joke.  
saucyaussie: like hell ya were  
saucyaussie: you're not even blocking me this time!!  
t.yamashiro: Because I'm giving you a chance to redeem yourself before you say anything worse you fucking idiot.  
saucyaussie: and ya think IM the one thats smitten to all hell…  
t.yamashiro: Digger I swear to god I'm not playing this game with you any longer.  
saucyaussie: so what? :^}  
t.yamashiro: I will talk to you tomorrow.  
saucyaussie: WAIT  
saucyaussie: FUCK  
saucyaussie: ITS ONLY 11  
saucyaussie: TATSU  
saucyaussie: NO COME ON PLEASE IM SORRY  
saucyaussie: youre gonna be at the cafe for lunch right please tell me youll be there

\- 1 hour later -

saucyaussie: TATSU  
saucyaussie: I just realized that ya probably DID fucking block me

\- 30 minutes later -

saucyaussie: YOURE NOT EVEN ON THE GROUP CHAT  
saucyaussie: harley won't even answer me  
t.yamashiro: Don't bring her into this.  
saucyaussie: i'm so fucking sorry please honestly i'm sorry for bugging ya all the time and i'm sorry for all these texts but i can't handle not being in contact with you for a whole day darl  
t.yamashiro: Then I suggest you figure out a way to fucking handle it or I'm actually blocking your number. It’s not attractive. Don't text Harley again. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Not midnight, not 1am and not 5am. Tomorrow. Wait for me to text you back. 

\--------The Next afternoon 12:30pm-------------

t.yamashiro: Digger?  
saucyaussie: yes? yes??? :^} <3333333333!!!!!!!  
t.yamashiro: Tone it down please.  
saucyaussie: right yeah sure thing darl  
saucyaussie: shit sorry  
t.yamashiro: Shut up. We're meeting somewhere in 2 hours.  
saucyaussie: what??????????  
saucyaussie: is this what i think it is??????  
saucyaussie: tatsu?????/ hello?  
t.yamashiro: I'm in class, don't you dare text me 20 lines, and learn to stop touching the enter bar please. Wait for me to text you back since you did so well before..  
saucyaussie: sure thing darl oh my god where are we gonna meet up??you know i'm on edge here in like 20 different senses wait are you in your business law class?? i'll wait outside the building im so fuckin excited :^}<3333

\---------- 2pm ---------

t.yamashiro: I have to get something from my car. Stay where you are.. I see you.  
saucyaussie: WHERE  
saucyaussie: I CANT EVEN SEE YOU THOUGH  
t.yamashiro: Lol :)  
saucyaussie: oh  
saucyaussie: you're cute  
saucyaussie: if ya didn't already know  
t.yamashiro: I forgot my wallet. Be back soon.  
saucyaussie: you're still leaving me in limbo though darl  
t.yamashiro: Do you like Korean BBQ?  
saucyaussie: does a bear shit in the woods? do i love you with the intensity of 100,000 suns?  
t.yamashiro: I don't know how you can love me when I treat you like this.  
saucyaussie: you're treating me to lunch though arent you? :^}  
t.yamashiro: No lol you are  
saucyaussie: shit

\-------------------------  
2pm - 5pm  
Tatsu and Digger had a decent lunch. Tatsu commented on Digger about how messy he was being in public. Digger called it their first lover's spat and Tatsu almost stabbed him in the hand with a fork. Digger laughed while continuing to eat and Tatsu honestly couldn't help to laugh as well. The rest of the lunch was quiet with small glances and small talk. Digger picked up the check.....His card was declined however. Tatsu wasn't surprised and handled it. She didn't take the action of his in vain. They walked out and Tatsu drove Digger back to campus. Digger asked her to stay on campus with him for a while longer. She threatened him once again and said she had to go home to study. Digger shot her a toothy grin and wink as she was walking away.

\- 15 minutes later -

saucyaussie: oi, i'm counting the seconds, darl ;^}  
t.yamashiro: ...  
saucyaussie: we didn't get a chance to talk  
t.yamashiro: No, we chose not to talk.  
saucyaussie: RIGHT  
saucyaussie: UH  
saucyaussie: honestly i'm still fuckin going bonkers over this? why did you? take me out?????  
t.yamashiro: I said I was giving you a chance.  
saucyaussie: OH  
saucyaussie: WOW  
t.yamashiro: You still can't figure out how to stop using the enter key.  
saucyaussie: DID HARLEY TALK YOU INTO THIS?  
t.yamashiro: You can't prove that she did.  
saucyaussie: HOLY SHIT  
t.yamashiro: Digger  
saucyaussie: HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!  
t.yamashiro: GEORGE  
saucyaussie: yes dear? :^}  
t.yamashiro: Let me just say that we're on slightly good terms.  
saucyaussie: we went on a date!! that's good!!  
t.yamashiro: I tried to stab you with a fork.  
saucyaussie: you're not the first one to do that  
t.yamashiro: What?!  
saucyaussie: yeah. what you curious? jealous? protective even?? :^}  
t.yamashiro: That is for women who don't know how to choose her battles, internally or physically.  
saucyaussie: ok ok  
saucyaussie: i feel like youre doing this all on purpose or you just, i dunno, dont know how to be nice to me? just mirror me, darl ;^}  
t.yamashiro: Excuse me? On purpose?  
saucyaussie: yeah! the bad girl bit. you wanna scare me off. but under all that you're a little soft kitten.  
t.yamashiro: Digger can I remind you who stabbed Rick over a comment about my backside?  
saucyaussie: uh  
t.yamashiro: It was me.  
t.yamashiro: And you've done much worse.  
t.yamashiro: So don't think this ISN'T how I already am.  
t.yamashiro: Again, you've only known me for a few months. Harley's known me for more than that and Rick even more.  
t.yamashiro: I'm the way I am around you that I am around everyone else. Even my friends.  
saucyaussie: that's a fucking lie, you took me out on a fucking date, dont tell me you went and dated rick before!!  
t.yamashiro: Lol no  
saucyaussie: oh  
saucyaussie: your point then  
t.yamashiro: You still have to make your impression on me since the one you've racked up so far is a Giant Fucking Thief, Pervert and maybe even A Chill Guy.  
saucyaussie: that's enough to get a date?  
t.yamashiro: I said I was giving you a chance, don't fucking push it.  
saucyaussie: ya still haven't touched on what I said darl  
t.yamashiro: What!?  
saucyaussie: do ya not know how to be nice to me?  
t. yamashiro: You don't deserve it. Yet.  
saucyaussie: :^} i'll take it  
saucyaussie: second question  
saucyaussie: why are ya giving me a chance and what the hell did harley say  
t.yamashiro: That's two questions, pick one.  
saucyaussie: .... first one  
t.yamashiro: It was my decision to.  
saucyaussie: :'^} ok  
saucyaussie: ok i dont need to know what harley said  
t.yamashiro: Yeah you really don't  
t.yamashiro: Hey I have to actually study now  
saucyaussie: oh i thought you were master multitasking there darl  
saucyaussie: so i've been taking up all your attention this whole time? :^}  
t.yamashiro: Goodnight Digger  
saucyaussie: okay goodnight darlin  
t.yamashiro: Oh. That's what darl is?  
saucyaussie: BAHAHA yeah!  
t.yamashiro: ... Ok.  
saucyaussie: you're making me the happiest bloke on planet earth.  
t.yamashiro: Hey, that could be changed.. Don't mess it up. See you tomorrow.  
saucyaussie: :^} sure thing darlin!!

\------ 12 am -------

t.yamashiro: This test is going to make me lose my mind.  
saucyaussie: woah you're up still?  
saucyaussie: night owl  
saucyaussie: you need a night time pal to help you calm down? ;^}  
t.yamashiro: Knock it off Digger  
saucyaussie: hey hey you're the one with the dirty mind!!  
saucyaussie: i was just talking about Pinky, wondering if you wanted to hold her for a night or something  
t.yamashiro: Right. I'm gonna wrap this up and actually sleep...

\- 10 Minutes later - 

t.yamashiro: .. Digger?  
t.yamashiro: Goodnight  
t.yamashiro: Hope you sleep well

\- 2 hours later -

saucyaussie: ya know you're more of a koala than a kitten, you got the lookin super cute and all but ya also got the claws  
t.yamashiro: They both look cute and both have claws.  
saucyaussie: BABE GO TO BED I WAS TRYNG 2 SEND YA A CUTE TEXT TO WAKE UP TO  
t.yamashiro: Fine


End file.
